Okay, Miss MOH, it’s time to brush up on the duties of a maid of honor. The responsibilities of the maid of honor are different than those of a regular bridesmaid. You were chosen for a very special role in the bride’s big day, so here’s what you need to know.

1) NUMBER ONE: BE THERE FOR YOUR BRIDE. I put it all in caps because this is the most critical of all the duties of the maid of honor. You know how help means so much more if you don’t have to ask for it? That’s what being a maid of honor is all about.

This means taking initiative. Ask her how the planning is going and what tasks she has to conquer this week/month. Then, choose some tasks to either help her with or take off her plate altogether. For example, if your bride has to send out save-the-dates next week, offer to come over with your best pen, some wedding movies, and a bottle of bubbly – and make a night of it. That’s taking your duties of a maid of honor super seriously… and your bride will love you for it.

2) Listen to her. Sounds simple, but among the responsibilities of the maid of honor is simply lending an ear. Let’s face it, people are probably going to get sick of the bride going on and on about wedding details… but you are not allowed! Part of being an MOH is listening to the bride and weighing in whenever she needs your help.

Is she struggling choosing her wedding palette? Can she not decide between a signature cocktail with alcohol or without? You’re there to be a sounding board and offer advice. She’ll be grateful – that’s for sure!

3) Rally the other bridesmaids. Brides choose their bridesmaids carefully and usually (whether this is okay or not), there is usually a certain level of expectation on the bride’s part for their level of involvement with the wedding planning. So, do what you can to keep the other bridesmaids organized, involved, and on the same page. Help out with placing dress orders and planning get-togethers for dress shopping, cake tasting, etc.

You may also find yourself needing to act as a buffer between the bridesmaids and the bride. If you have a bit of a bridezilla on your hands, the bridesmaids may need a place to vent, too – and that probably means you. Yes, this is one of the less pleasant duties of the maid of honor, but if you can try to maintain smooth sailing, your bride will thank you for it.

Duties of a Maid of Honor (the other stuff)

There are, of course, a few duties of a maid of honor that are a little more cut and dry. They are:

• Plan the bridal shower
• Plan the bachelorette party
• Attend all pre- and post-wedding parties
• Spreading the word about the couple’s registries
• Giving a toast to the bride at the wedding reception

Keep in mind that you can and should enlist the help of the bridesmaids for the pre-wedding parties. Also, keep in mind that not every bride will want a bachelorette or want you to speak at the reception… but these are the traditional responsibilities of the maid of honor, so keep them in mind.

Get more info on bridal shower and bachelorette party planning.

As you can see, the maid of honor tasks are kind of subtle in nature. Yes, there are the normal tasks, but there is also the less obvious job of simply supporting your bride. Do what you can to be there for her, without her having to ask. That will officially earn you the title of best maid of honor ever.

Photo Credit: jumpyjodes via Flickr